Sleeping on Friday.

This week was filled with sleep drama. Ivy spent her Thanksgiving weekend up late and wasn't sure she wanted to get back to routine. 

Multiple nights found she and her parents up at 3am, listening to screaming and wearing densely packed bags under their eyes the next day - all three of them. Helena admitted that a great deal of it is Ivy testing them and we talked about compromises. Doing things that communicate to Ivy this is how we do things, while still parenting in a way that feels loving and nurturing - never sliding down that road of doing things they don't believe in that can later lead to guilt-parenting. 

With all of my heart I believe that parents should do what they believe in. But with just as much conviction I believe that children are very behavioral in their learning. If you bend one time, they are going to expect you to bend every. single. time. Consistency is key and regular sleep helps babies and children to grow. 

One of the SIDS reports out there states that babies who sleep in the room with their parents until six months old are less likely to die of SIDS. Ivy takes every nap in her crib, in her room. I leave the door open, cover her lightly and she naps - going to sleep and waking up on her own. every time. Every night Ivy sleeps in a travel crib next to Helena & Mitchell's bed. She gets overtired, cries and has a hard time going to sleep. But she does sleep, in the crib,almost every night. At least once or twice each week she "can"t" make it through the night or becomes inconsolable and sleeps in the swing. It isn't a perfect system, but it is a system that is working for everyone.

Until this week.

I think a lot of things have come into play here. The biggest being the return to routine after four days off. Another variable is Ivy's level of health. Now Ivy is a healthy girl, eats well, sleeps well, grows predictably, etc, but after a visit with a lot of extended family she generally gets a stuffy nose. I'm sure it gets worse at night, but during the day, awake or asleep, you can't really tell. So there's that. Then there's another biggie, Ivy is creeping up on six months old. She is an astute girl who generally seems pretty quick. Want an example?

During the day it's generally just Ivy and I here. If she's feeling challenging or fussy she whines or complains mildly in her crib. It almost always passes. Now, occasionally Helena stays home from work or leaves later in the day. On days when she is here, even if Ivy doesn't see her, if she is feeling challenging or fussy she coughs. Now if Mitchell is home, late day, working from home, etc, when Ivy feels challenging she cries. A lot. And - if this doesn't illustrate enough, I have one more. Twice each week the housekeeper is here. How Ivy knows this from her bed I don't know, but on these days, when she feels challenging or fussy she talks and laughs. Not kidding. Every. time. 

So, at night time, when she wants to play or have someone put her to sleep or snack or get a ride in the swing or just feels challenging or fussy she screams. She screams and screams and screams. And she stays up until after 9pm every night. Otherwise she'll scream. 

She's working it. Helena knows it. Mitchell knows it. Norah isn't even here and Norah knows it. 

Within the next two weeks Ivy is going to sleep overnight in her crib.

She's never done that.

We've never asked her to do that.

I wonder what she'll think about that?

Current Position

The job-search process was brutal. I've never really had much trouble finding a position I felt I'd enjoy. But I doubt my standards have ever been so high. My last position was great for my resume and great for exploring new perspectives, but it was tough on me. Tougher than I was willing to realize for a long time.

Over the course of four months I talked with at least fifty families. I interviewed with about twenty, did trial days with two, was offered three and knew this one was for me.

Interviews are an intense thing for me, I know, so out of character. A quick interview, post phone interview, lasts about an hour and a half. Most take about two hours. Two families back, when I met with Clover, I stayed for three hours. No interview had come close. Then I met with Mitchell and Helena.

Initially we talked on the phone, post agency interview, and my being weeded out of fifty candidates. This specific agency requires video interviews as part of the application packet sent to families. It was my video that earned me the initial phone interview which led to the video interview and finally an in-person meeting.

We talked, the three of us, for about an hour and a half, then Mitchell had to get to work. Helena and I continued to chat for 3.5 hours longer! I was having such a great time, but we were half an hour from my house and my mother-in-law was due to arrive in an hour. I said my goodbyes - to Helena and her offspring - then headed home with the understanding they LOVED me and would call with an offer. The next day they called and the following Monday, two days later, I started working.

While I interviewed with a triplet family, 25-week-twin-family, twin families, sibling par families and everything in-between I ended up with a singleton. One, sweet, ten week old little girl. She was adorable-darling, the sweetest little thing. Just perfect. Ivy. Dear little Ivy. No health concerns, no issues, no reflux, no worries other than regular childhood concerns that every kid-parent-nanny trio deals with.

Honestly, I was kind of worried I'd be bored. Really bored. Mind-numbingly bored. But that's not really me is it? I don't really do bored. I do busy. I do productive. I do accomplished.

So what do Ivy and I do? We read. We work on tummy time and other gross motor skills. We sing. We get the [baby]laundry done. And [baby]ironing. And [baby] returns. And swim lessons. And grocery shopping. And when I feel like it I cook. When I don't, I don't.

It's really, really wonderful.

Lil' Ivy.

We've been together three months now.