Inspiration out of the blue.

Everything is so calm here today in preemie-ville. Grandmommie and Sara are out to lunch, Roger is working, Norah is here helping with feeds and the tomatoes are running on schedule, napping well and being cute. Not really much on my mind related to twins or preemies or even nannying. Then from thin air an email arrives from Ashley (also a former employer and mother of girl-boy twins, Sophia and Max).

In an instant I'm lost in old photos. There are so many memory provoking photos from the nearly four years I spent with Sophia and Max, two of the most beautiful boy-girl twins, the only full term set, it is a pleasure to wade through them. And yet time and time again my favorite photo remains the same. One of the last few I took as their nanny. They are three and a half and completely lost in their own worlds, yet the shot captures such feeling and possibility, and at the same time nostalgia for youth. The picture inspires me.

Settle Back and Share

Yesterday we met with a new pediatrician. He was great, a real old fashion doctor's office and pediatric practice, no nurses, nobody else to relay the same story to five times, only him. He writes, he spent years in academia and he loves what he does. It was exactly what it should have been from the beginning.

Most parents have nine months of pregnancy with which they can interview, meet and choose a pediatrician. Something highly I'd recommend. But when your two babies spend only 25 weeks - six months - in there, well, things get pushed aside because there is only so much time in each day. The earliest weeks are a fight for their lives, tests, transfusions, isolettes and when they are finally ready, kangaroo care. Three hours each day that you can just hold them, feel their little hearts beating against yours and share skin contact with these amazing little people that have fought so hard to be here. And most parents are back to work during this time so that they can use that precious maternity leave when their sweet babies are home. Which is a great thing for the parents AND the babies. It can also be a time when family can meet the new babies for the first time. It is a great time for friends and family to help out, cook, clean, lend a hand even hold a baby if that is what is needed. Sometimes it is nicest for parents if the help is focused on chores rather than holding, diapering and feeding because they have been sharing all of that with nurses and are excited to do it themselves.

If there is a nanny entering the picture, like me, this is an amazing opportunity to get to know one another better. Personal histories, relationships, likes and dislikes, it all builds communication and trust and aids in bonding. I love the first few weeks of this so much. With each family I have enjoyed it more. My current position, opportunity number sixteen, has been the best by far. Both Roger and Sara have spent time just talking with me as well as Norah (she spent the first week here as the babies came home sooner than expected and I was finishing with my last family). But as it comes to an end, I'm always ready.

I'm not sure whether I begin to distance myself because I know the end is near or whether it just starts to get annoying. There is no way to separate the two. In this case Roger and Sara aren't the ones I'm ready to get space from, grandmommie is. She's been visiting for nearly three weeks now. And while she is extremely kind, pleasant and caring, she's started pushing my buttons a bit. But, she leaves on Monday, and I can handle that.

In other news Early Intervention (EI) came today to evaluate the tomatoes. Jackson, who always seems a bit ahead of Tabitha, physically, wanted nothing to do with the EI people. He just wanted to sleep and actually fell asleep during the assessment. Tabitha on the other hand (to be fair she had the better person,Jackson's was dull and reserved) performed better than ever. She couldn't do everything she was asked but she was a great sport and made it through the entire assessment. We had to wake both of them for it. Next week they will return with a plan of action (called an Individualized Family Service Plan, IFSP) for each baby.

Which brings me back to the pediatrician. As much as I enjoyed the experiemce of meeting with this new person, I detested each moment I had to spend with the last. He was young, cocky and absent-minded. Not at all worth my sweet tomatoes (seems silly but everyone wants a chance to work with them because they were 25 weekers). Let's hope these Early Intervention people don't disappoint me because nanny or not I wield a pretty big pull from where I stand.

Until next time.

31 weekers lost, 25 weekers found

As promised, update, specifics and daily routine - but not in that order.

Our daily routine looks a lot like yours would if you've had or have a newborn. We eat every three hours, burp every ounce (20 ml/cc) and then sleep. If either of the babies has any energy after all of the eating, sleeping, burping and diaper-filling then it is directed to just before a feed. This way we aren't over stimulating them or taking away any opportunities for them to sleep.

Being preemies they need to sleep as much as they need to eat. It is very important for them to sleep in every cycle and hopefully get into that deep sleep where they will release their growth hormone.

Just how premature are they? My little tomatoes, Jackson and Tabitha, were born at 25 weeks 5 days gestation. They were three months early. They missed 1/3 of their womb time. And not only did they survive but - BUT they are thriving!!! We are all very grateful.

The first thing most people are interested in is weight. Jackson was 1 lb. 15 oz at birth, Tabitha was 1lb 15 oz at birth. As of this morning Jackson is 9 lb. 9 oz and Tabitha is 10 lb. 14 oz! They are doing wonderfully. We are one month and two days past their due date today. They are four months actual age and one month corrected age.

Recently Norah assessed them using the Bayley [Scales of Infant Development]. They scored remarkably well. Their gross motor was delayed, tested at their corrected ages, but everything else - including fine motor skills - tested much closer to or right at their actual ages. Cognitive was their highest, Hooray! They each scored within one point of each other, Jackson scoring that tiny bit higher.

As you can tell the new family is wonderful. Roger and Sara are highly educated, open-minded and intelligent. I enjoy working with them, helping with ideas, routines and changes, even just chatting with them. While it wasn't a long-awaited change, finishing with my last family and starting fresh has been so much better than I could have hoped.

The last family had 31 week preemie twins, also boy-girl. Madison and Addison were amazing but Clover and Stephen's expectations were a tad low. While I was there we maximized their intelligence, interactions, growth and development. Within days of my leaving they were different children. The two years I spent there since their arrival home were lost in a matter of 72 hours. Madison and Addison were so demanding, slimy and cranky the last time I saw them that I'm having trouble missing them at all. The broccoli-loving-toddlers that I loved and remember are far from the tired-drooly-fit-throwers they are today. It is very disappointing because I work so hard to educate the parents as well as the children.

What is done is done. I can move on.

Time to finish for today, but a quick update/recap.
New job is great. Jackson and Tabitha are great. I am great.
New place is nice, mostly organized and comfortable.
Norah is pretty good. She had her 1st therapy client today. (very, very exciting as she is only in the beginning of her second year as a PsyD student)
And Basel is good. He's learning to swim! Funniest thing ever!

More tomorrow - until then.

Transition into Awareness

August was the month of transition.

My new tomatoes (charges) came home from the hospital. Norah and I took a vacation. We moved (HOORAY!). And, and, I STARTED A NEW JOB.

There has been so much on my plate that I shied from blogging because who really wants to hear about what I do and what I'm up to? It seems silly. Then yesterday I came across "Preemie" magazine. Inside I found articles and more advertisements than you would believe for crap no parent needs. Then, this morning, I came across a personal story. This parent of 27 weekers was sharing their experience so far, their boy-girl twins are now toddlers. Honestly, I was eating it up! The bed-rest, birth, NIC, coming home, growth, development, and so on. And it really made me think. While what I'm doing may seem old hat to me, there are others, nannies, parents, caregivers, extended family, etc, that are just starting this journey. It looks different from where ever one stands in life. Who am I to keep the good, the bad and the binky to myself? I LOVE what I do. I enjoy sharing tips, ideas and insights, why shouldn't I blog?

Next installment; new family specifics, daily routine and update.
Until next time.



UPDATE: For a long time, my blog wasn't really noticed. A handful of people around the world probably stumble upon it and read a bit. Nothing regular or noteworthy. Then I made a post that annoyed a preemie mom, I'm not sure what she was really angry with because she has read most of my blog. Maybe she was having a bad day and that post hit her wrong. Whatever her reasoning she has started a personal crusade against me, pretty much telling other moms that I am the devil.

She wasn't here, I blog summaries and she can't possibly know what happened enough to deem me the devil. Because of her a lot of the personalization of this blog has been lost. It is sad, but some people need to attack others to make themselves feel better. I don't know her or her situation just as she doesn't know me or mine. Having a preemie doesn't explain everything, these tomatoes are happy, healthy, thriving little babies and nothing I've done has jeopardized that, on the contrary, I have given more of myself to this family than any other nanny I know. She's allowed to have her opinions and I mine, no one person should assume they know everything about a person because they've read something that person has written. Look athow much was written by Shakespeare. (of course I'm no Shakespeare, but you get the idea.)

Napping around the house.

Jackson and Tabitha love sleeping on a blanket on the floor. They are so relaxed being together and so sweet just calmly sleeping wherever I am. It is a true treat and definite job perk.